The finer points of Korean sanitation

The last couple of days have been...interesting, to say the least. What most of my classes are doing for the next few weeks is giving presentations on Korean culture. Any aspect of Korean culture, however small and obscure. And it has prompted some amazing results. We are but four classes into the presentations, and there will be close to 20, and I've already seen:

• hilarious demonstrations of traditional table manners;
• examples of superstitions;
• dramatisations of ajumma on the subway (middle-aged married woman who have incredible power in Korea);
• an explanation of 'comfort women' - Korean and Chinese women who were taken hostage by the Japanese army during WWII and forced to work in brothels;
• and learned an awful lot about Korean wedding traditions...like spying on the newlyweds on their wedding night "to give them support", and tying up the groom by his feet, hanging him upside down, and hitting the soles of his feet with sticks...all I can say is, good luck to Geordie Patrick!

But by far the most amusing presentations have been about the traditional Korean toilet. Now, for those of you who have not been fortunate enough to experience an Asian toilet, one word should tell you all...squatter. In fact, I've found a photo...

There, that's a squatter. And, as the name suggests, you squat. More on the contemporary conundrums posed by such a device later, but now back to my students' presentations. (By the way, the hood-type bit is the front, in case you were wondering. People often do...)

True traditional Korean toilets were two planks of wood set across a hole in the ground. And we had kids on top of the chairs to demonstrate this, yes, indeed, squatting! Apparently all the human waste was collected (by the "generals of dung"), mixed with ash and used to fertilise the soil. Nice. Makes some tasty potatoes, I'm sure! There is the legend of the toilet ghost, who comes up from the hole and offers you blue or red toilet paper, then makes your hip whatever colour it was you chose! And then the best of all...is a two-storied toilet: toilet on the second story...pig living on the first. The pig consumes the waste, which protects it from poisonous snakes, and apparently makes for tasty pork. Although Tony and I aren't too sure about that! We're never eating pork in Jeju (which is where this apparently still happens). But the best bit of this pig story is that, sometimes the pig is really hungry....so it will jump up and bite your bum, so you have to fight it off with a stick. So we thought you took the stick with you into the toilet. Nope, it's already there!

Seriously, we had two of these presentations, each time telling us something new and fascinating! So we spent a lot of today, literally, talking about crap. It's so odd how they feel so free talking about it - I guess the British are still quite prudish about some things. I had one of my co-teachers ask me how I was dealing with the squatters, as there are no Western toilets in our school. One of the male co-teachers I should say!

The first time I was faced with one of these was a little terrifying - I hadn't been warned about them, and it was on a 6 hour train trip in Japan, so I had no option, and no clue! The biggest problem for Westerners is that we're not used to squatting, whereas Asians can be seen on street corners, squatting (not over a toilet, obviously, just "resting"). So it hurts the old knees and thighs, and takes quite a while to get balance sorted! I was doing alright...until I decided I needed a splint on my leg, and that's making it very very difficult again.

Right, enough of that sewer talk (sorry, couldn't resist!). I can't believe I've just talked about toilets for that long! Honestly, though, I'm learning so many fascinating little bits about Korean culture. It's amazing how much tradition and culture there is. I guess we don't think about our own cultures until we have to tell others about it, and there are probably customs that are so insignificant that we don't even think about it until someone points them out.

Enough of my musings, on to some great news! (Well, great for me, and for Peter.) As I said in my previous, very short blog, I've decided to go to Shanghai. In a fortnight's time is Chuseok, which is Korean thanksgiving, one of the two biggest holidays in Korea. That, combined with students' mid-terms right before, means I have a full week off work, with the two weekends at either side. The way I see it, I have so much time to explore Korea at the weekends, but if I have a substantial length of time off, I need to go travel, baby! And travel within and around Korea gets both fully booked up and much more expensive at holiday times. This way, I avoid the rush by leaving before it all kicks off and coming back just after. So I got in touch with the wandering brother, who I haven't seen in 18 months, found myself a flight to Shanghai, and booked it mighty fast as the seats were going as I watched! It's also Golden Week in China, so they have a week's holiday too, but I'm looking forward to seeing, doing and eating anything! So excited about it, I've been telling my students all day!

Should be off the crutches by the end of the weekend, so Shanghai will be a good way to celebrate being able to walk again! It's getting better, both ankles still slightly swollen but not as sore. I'm just so fed up with the splint and the bandages and the crutches, although it is nice having all the other teachers offering me lifts! And when I get back from Shanghai, I plan to join a gym (because I found one near me) and start yoga (as soon as I can find out where it is...can't read the Korean map!) Full of good intentions me!

Righto I've written far too much. Which is even worse considering most of it was about toilets! I shall leave all my other musings for another day. I hope people are still reading this! The comments have died down a little, but this is operating as my journal these days, so it's good for me to write it all down, even if no one else cares! (It's fun to have dramatic hissy fits!)

Oh, a happy, slightly belated birthday, to the lovely Miss Bridget.

Ta ta folks. Hope all are well.